i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize