I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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