i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Randomize