i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize