They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
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