East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
