I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
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