Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
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Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
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I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
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