yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
