I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
