Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Randomize
