Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
did you just send me my own nude
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
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