Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Randomize
