I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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