He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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