i dedicated my morning wood to you.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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