You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
wow bdsm is so cute
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
