Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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