the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
