Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Randomize
