Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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