yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
my vag is so smooth its legendary
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
