There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
