did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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