Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Randomize
