I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I will pee on everything he values.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
