She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
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