KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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