Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
