I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize