Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize