You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
