he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
