I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
