you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
