Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(619): View more from California

I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.

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(305): View more from Florida

best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting

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(925): View more from California

Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.

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23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”
Read it at the TFLN blog
(563): View more from Iowa

The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.

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(812): View more from Indiana

Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.

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(614): View more from Ohio

Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me

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(641): View more from Iowa

What the hell did you do last night?

(786): View more from Florida

I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.

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