im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
its not stalking. its research.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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