Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
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As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
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Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
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