brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
and you fell through a lawn chair
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Randomize
