how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
