Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
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