I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
either way he was missing a nipple.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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