weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
He better not be in your backpack
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
jump out the window naked night went bad
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