i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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