id be glad to
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
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