I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Duck Duck Cougar?
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
