the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize