he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize
