Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
