dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
you're hired as official boob wrangler
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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