My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Randomize
