He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
The ass gains better be worth it
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